Silence

My quiet time today took me to Genesis 22, the story of Abraham's test of faith. The chapter starts out as so...

"Some time later God tested Abraham, He said to him, 'Abraham!'
'Here I am,' he replied.
Then God said, 'Take your son, your only son, whom you love - Isaac - and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you," (verses 1-2).

Scripture goes on to describe Abraham's journey to the mountain. It took Abraham 3 entire days to get to this mountain. As I was reading, I couldn't help but notice that the Scripture only shows one sentence that God said to Abraham about the sacrifice. But you and I know Abraham most likely had several more sentences in response to this. Maybe something like...

"WHAT?!? ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?"
"WHAT ABOUT THE GREAT NATION HE IS TO BECOME?"
"I THOUGHT CHILD SACRIFICE WAS FOR THE HEATHENS!"
"I WAITED 100 YEARS FOR THAT CHILD AND YOU'RE TAKING HIM AWAY JUST LIKE THAT?"
"Oh great, how am I going to explain this one to Sarah?"

At least, that's what I'd be doing. Questioning God. Asking Him the age-old question "Why?" Yet Scripture shows no further dialogue. When they reach the mountain, Abraham tells his servants, "Stay here with the donkey while I and the boy go over there. We will worship and then we will come back to you" (verse 5). The "we" in this sentence was blaring to me. Abraham believed that God would provide, even though God gave no evidence of it.

I needed this passage this morning. I have a friend who desperately needs God's healing. I have prayed and prayed and prayed for my dear friend. Both of us have questioned God, asking Him why he hasn't provided the healing yet. Asking Him if it'll ever come. I believe that God has revealed to me that He will heal her, so I can't help but be a little frustrated watching her suffer while she waits. Ever since God revealed this to me, He has been silent. I have been so frustrated with this. Over and over again I read in the Bible that God listens to prayers.

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Which of you, if your son asks for bread will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" Matthew 7:7-11

"If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer." Matthew 21:22

"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask or in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours." Mark 11:24

The verses God provides in His Word about prayer go on and on about God answering prayer to those who believe. God's Word never contradicts itself. God's Word never fails. Genesis 22 provided me with encouragement today because it reminded me that silence doesn't mean "No." Silence doesn't mean your prayers are falling on deaf ears. Silence doesn't mean God doesn't care. Abraham suffered through silence as I'm sure he asked God a million questions. He suffered through silence for three days as he faithfully made his way to the mountain. The silence didn't keep him from moving. He obeyed despite the silence. He had faith that God would come through, and told others about it as well.

I believe my friend will be healed will all of my heart. I have prayed for her literally a thousand times I'm sure and I'll pray for her a thousand more. I believe the Scriptures that God has provided me and I have faith that, even though He is silent right now, He will follow through. And when he does, I'm throwing her the biggest party she's ever had. (She thinks I'm kidding about this but I'm definitely not!)

I want to encourage you today to stand firm if you are waiting through silence. Obey despite the silence and have faith through the silence, just like Abraham. Oh, and God will reward you. That's the best part of the story!

"The angel of the Lord called to Abraham from heaven a second time and said, 'I swear by myself, declares the Lord, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me," (verses 15-17).

And one more additional passage to encourage anyone who's waiting on answered prayers...

"Then Jesus said to them, 'Suppose you have a friend, and you go to him at midnight and say, "Friend, lend me three loaves of bread; a friend on mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing t set before him." And suppose the one inside answers, "Don't bother me. The door is already locked, and my children and I are in bed. I can't get up and give you anything." I tell you, even though he will not get up and give you the bread because of friendship, yet because of your shameless audacity he will surely get up and give you as much as you need." Luke 11:5-8

Momitis

All of us need a friend we can talk to about anything. It's a human instinct. I am blessed to have several friends that I feel I can open up to. I have one friend, however, who practically shares a brain with me. I say this because it doesn't matter what I say, she gets me. We can laugh about stupid things, encourage one another in perfect ways, and talk about anything without feeling judged. Laura always turns me towards the Lord. She always reminds me to pray when I'm stressed. She always reminds me that God is in control. She knows exactly when to ask that grounding "Have you prayed about this?" question that pulls me back towards our Father. She is a gift from God.

Yesterday I get to spend some time with Laura and, because we are girls, we ended up talking about hair and make-up. She did mine for me and taught me new fun tricks. But the lesson I learned was a lot bigger than how to blend eyeshadow...

We decided I have what I like to call "Momitis". I'm not actually a mom, of course, but I take care of myself like one. I work 50+ hours a week in a place where hair and make-up are the least of my worries. I'm an online student so I wear my PJ's to class. I have always had this concept that my appearance doesn't matter to the kingdom of God so why let myself get distracted by it. I don't allow myself to get caught up in my appearance because I feel "guilty". Sound familiar?

I'm not saying that taking care of your appearance is something to focus on. But after my wonderful talk with Laura, I think God enjoys us having fun. He created us, right? He gave us our long locks and I think He enjoys watching us play with them. There's no reason for me to avoid wearing make-up or nice clothes just because I serve God. It does, however, mean that I need to keep it in check. I should never allow it to distract me from Christ.

I want to encourage all of my "Mom" friends out there (including those of us who aren't moms but treat ourselves like them) to allow yourself some slack. It's ok to take care of yourself. It's ok to wear eyeshadow. It's ok to take a few extra minutes to get ready. How many of us keep track of laundry, dishes, dinner, and schedules without a hitch? But the one thing we slack off on is ourselves. Because we don't have to listen to ourselves complain. Nobody notices when we don't take care of ourselves because we excuse it for each other. "It just comes with the territory."

Glorify God by praising His creativity. Glorify Him by having a taking care of yourself. Not because you should, but because you can. It's ok to have fun, right?

So, after we came up with my diagnosis, Laura surprised me at work today with a gift. She got me eye shadow, mascara, brushes, everything a girl needs! I wanted to fall over when I saw it. I wanted to cry. I wanted go in the bathroom and start experimenting with it. It's not the things that made the gift important to me. It's the concept. She gave me a box of "You're important." She gave me a box of "You matter too."

That's a good friend. Thanks Laura!

Middle Ground

Right now I'm hanging out in this transition part of my life. Michael and I have moved out of our apartment and in with his parents for a month as our house is nearing completion. These transition periods in our lives can be so frustrating sometimes. We've almost got what we want, but we have to wait for it. Patience.

The human race is obsessed with the finish line. We climb corporate ladders and are dissatisfied until we are at the very top. We run marathons, ultras, century runs for the elation of crossing the finish line. We have phrases like "Go for the gold" that encourage us that everything will be worth it in the end.

But ... what about right now? What about the exhausting, frustrating task of waiting? Waiting for that dream job to open up so you can finally get out of the horrible job you're stuck in. Waiting until you're old enough to get married. Waiting until college starts so you can move out of your parent's house. Waiting until your house is finally done being built. Waiting...

Our pastor calls it "Wait Training." Building up our spiritual muscles while we wait. There's something mysteriously beautiful about waiting. Maybe it's the curiosity of Christmas Eve. Maybe it's joy of a new baby that will soon be in your arms. Waiting can be one of the most frustrating tasks ever. It felt like forever before Michael finally proposed. Every day became agonizing. Yet, the frustration changed nothing.

I'm sitting here in my in-law's house, our life in boxes in the garage, and I have a choice. I can be frustrated. Why can't the house be done already? Why couldn't the apartment complex stretch our lease just one more month? What if the sale falls through? But at the end of the day, I would have just wasted  month of my life being frustrated and anxious.

I challenge all of the "waiters" out there to praise God for this time period. Praise God for the blessing that is to come. Praise God for the fact that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Praise God for the wonderful things that you had before this waiting period came and for the joy you will once again experience when it's over. And praise God for His plan. That He is never late, never early. That He has chosen that specific time that you (move out, have the baby, get that job, get married) for a reason. Praise Him for His wisdom. How many stupid things would you have done if you didn't have to sit around and wait? Praise God that sometimes waiting gets us out of a situation we wouldn't have wanted to be in. And praise God for His promise. That it IS worth it in the end. Just remember that whatever you're waiting for, that's not the finish line. Wait on Heaven.